By Jupiter

Among the Amazons, women are the rulers and the warriors, while the men stay at home, mind the children, and shop for new hats. The Greek heroes Theseus and Hercules arrive at the head of an army five thousand strong, determined to capture the Sacred Girdle of Diana, currently adorning the waist of the Amazon Queen Hippolyta. Along with the Greeks comes the war correspondent Homer, author of a recent bestselling communiqué called The Iliad.

Hippolyta needs financing to fight the Greeks, so Pomposia, a wealthy widow, makes a bargain: she will back the war if Hippolyta will marry her foppish, insubstantial son Sapiens – nicknamed “Sappy.” Sappy doesn’t like the arrangement himself, being accustomed to plenty of female attention with no strings attached.

The Amazons capture the Greek warriors, and a romance sparks between Theseus and the beautiful captain of the warrior Amazons, Antiope. Naturally the contagious love-bug spreads through the ranks of the troops on both sides, and the Amazonian utopia collapses – Sappy is now the leader of their civilization.